I spent most of my life up until around 25 trying to fit in to this world.
I remember in school never wanting to stand out too much, and just blend in with the crowd. I would wear the same clothes as my friends, I would straighten my hair and put on make up to be like the "cool" girls. I avoided wearing anything bright and bold as I didn't want to be stared at.
As I got older I desperately tried to want normal things. To be into what my friends were into. Through uni I attended many parties and nights out just because everyone else was when I would have way rather of stayed in, painting, reading or watching a documentary on a Saturday night.
I always felt odd and the more I felt odd the more I tried to conform to the norm.
Ironic isn’t it? How the more distant we feel from something the more desperately we try to cling on and make it happen.
I knew I wanted a different life to what I could see everyone else was living but it took me years to gain the courage to do me and create that life.
There’s always a pivot point - a point where we ask ourselves is this really the life I came here to live? It’s common that this shift hits after university as people try to find their way in the world, searching for jobs in the areas they have studies. Another popular time a profound shift can take place is around 27, the time of our Saturn return.
It's often here that we have been working for a few years and figured out what we like/dislike and pulled away from fitting in to explore who we really are deep down inside.
For me I had my greatest shift at 25. I could no longer pretend to like things or do what my friends were doing. I broke away and went on a journey to really find the authentic me I had buried deeply. My health was the main catalyst of this change, and health issues is a common catapult into a different direction in life. I changed careers from Graphic Design to holistic therapies and began learning about the body and mind and particularly how I was wired and what worked for me and my journey here.
The shift was uncomfortable. I lost a lot of friends and grieved many times for old versions of myself that slipped away as I became more and more the true me. But after the turbulence and moving through the changes a sense of confidence and peace washes over you as you finally step out into the world as the person you were born to be without the need to fit in or do what society deems as "normal".
Stepping out and breaking the mould takes courage. It takes sacrifices but it also brings with it many rewards. So to those of you who are in that shift - I know a lot of you are right now especially after the turbulence of COVID, remember this; Where the old paradigm is falling away and new questions and feelings are arising, keep telling yourself that it is ok for you to live however you want to live. Whatever works for you. Stand out. Be different.
The sooner you embrace the real life that you want to live without trying to fit in with those around you, the the sooner everything starts to feel more aligned within you.
Not everyone will understand the way you choose to live, but you will come to understand yourself on an honest, deeper level. And from there life begins to unfold in a whole new way. If you are going through a shift and want guidance to step into the life you really came here to live then I would love to support you. Check out my Mentorship options. I wouldn't be where I am today without the help of some amazing mentors along the way.
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